Where Bullying Starts—and How We Can End It Together

Bullying isn’t just about fistfights—it hides in silence, in group chats, even in everyday routines. This piece digs into why bullies exist, how victims can stay strong, and how schools, families, and communities can build a culture of respect where no student has to live in fear.

This is a long read, but it’s not just filler. Everything here has purpose. There’s pain, but also answers.

No sugarcoating—bullying still happens in many schools. Sometimes it’s obvious: yelling, kicking, name-calling. Other times it’s silent: being ignored, excluded, or constantly shut down. It still hurts. And yes, self-defense like Taekwondo can help boost confidence, but the real solution to bullying goes deeper than punches and kicks.

It’s not about fighting back. The goal is to create a space where no one needs to hurt or scare others.


Let’s Ask

Where is bullying coming from today? One major source is social media. Online platforms can feel like a battlefield—likes, shares, group chats, and anonymous messages can build or break someone’s day. But bullying is not just digital. It still happens face-to-face, especially where adults aren’t watching: hallways, hangouts, group work, even inside classrooms.

  • Why are students losing their temper so quickly?
  • Why does violence become the instant solution?
  • Where is the guidance that should be present?

1. Why Do Bullies Exist?

Bullies aren’t born bullies—they’re shaped by something. That “something” could be many things: toxic home environments, peer pressure, online influencers who glorify being rude or dominant, or shows and content that make bullying look “cool.” When kids constantly see the rude ones portrayed as heroes, sometimes they think that’s how they should act.

Not every bully is naturally mean. Some carry pain, insecurity, or lack of control in other areas of life. They try to take power the wrong way—by putting others down. This doesn’t excuse them, but it shows where the help needs to start.

2. Helping Bullies Change

Some bullies lash out because they were once hurt themselves—but that doesn’t make it right. It only shows where healing must begin. Some bullies were victims in the past. Instead of healing, they turned to violence. They need help to process this—not pity, but proper guidance.

Give them room to reflect. Have conversations. Introduce empathy programs or counseling when needed. Let them see that respect brings more than fear. It’s better to be admired for kindness than feared for cruelty.

3. For the Bullied: Stay Cool, Stay Strong

Being bullied is painful, but you’re not powerless. Being “cool” doesn’t mean staying silent—it means knowing your worth. Know who to approach, how to protect your peace, and how to respond without copying the bully’s behavior.

4. Watch Out for Cyberbullying

When kids are at home, bullying often turns digital. In group chats, memes, or DMs—attacks can happen anytime. Parents and siblings need to stay aware of their digital world. Not by spying, but by talking, listening, and guiding.

5. Bullying Happens Outside School Too

Bullies aren’t only in schools. You can find them on street corners, basketball courts, or neighborhood hangouts. That’s why families, barangays, and communities must also play a role. Kids are safer when positive activities exist—sports, arts, or volunteer work.

6. The Role of Parents, Guardians, and Siblings

Be present. Be observant. Sometimes a simple question—“Are you okay?”—is enough. Watch for changes in mood, silence, or sudden shifts in routine. Talk about emotions. Teach them to speak up and control impulses.

If you’re an older sibling, uncle, or aunt—be a guide. Don’t just say “ignore it.” Be someone they can trust. You’re their first superhero.

7. A Culture of Respect Starts with Us

Respect isn’t just saying “please” or “thank you.” It’s how you treat people every day. Teachers, staff, and students all share this responsibility. Model it. Show it. Live it.

8. Speak Up—Even If You’re Not the Target

Silence protects bullies. If you see someone being hurt—say something. Defend them. Report it. One voice can change everything.

9. Teachers, Be Present

Don’t just be physically present. Sometimes you’re there but unaware of what’s happening. Bullying hides in corners—hallways, group projects, even school chats. Be observant. Listen. Trust your instincts.

10. Support Both Sides

Support the bullied. Guide the bully. Both need help. One carries visible wounds, the other may carry hidden ones. Respond with justice, but lead with compassion.

11. Strength in Peers

Peer-to-peer talks can be powerful. Sometimes kids listen more to their own age group. Create safe zones—buddy systems, support groups, or safe chats. Every student deserves a safe space.

12. Make Reporting Safe and Simple

Don’t make reporting scary. Keep it easy, confidential, and free of shame. Let students know they will be supported, not blamed.

13. We’re All in This Together

The solution isn’t just the school’s responsibility. Families, barangays, even guards and tricycle drivers are part of the community that must help break the cycle.


The Real Goal

This isn’t just about academics. It’s about making students feel safe, supported, and respected—whether in classrooms or on the streets. Ending bullying isn’t about building fighters. It’s about raising people who choose kindness.

Because no student should ever be afraid just to live.

𝚃𝚢𝚙𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝙾𝚞𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝙱𝚕𝚞𝚎 • 𝖽𝖺𝗋𝖾𝗆.𝗆𝗎𝗌𝗂𝖼.𝖻𝗅𝗈𝗀

Word of Life • September 2025

“Rejoice with me, for I have found my lost sheep.” (Luke 15:6)

“Rejoice with me, for I have found my lost sheep.” (Luke 15:6)

Shepherds in the Ancient East used to count sheep when they returned from the pasture and were always ready to set out in search if one was missing. They would even brave the desert and the night in order to find those sheep that had gone astray.

This parable is a story of loss and finding again that clearly demonstrates the shepherd’s love for the flock. He notices that one of the sheep is missing, searches for it, finds it, and carries it on his shoulders because it is weak, frightened, perhaps wounded, and unable to follow the shepherd unaided. He brings the sheep back to safety and, finally, full of joy, invites his neighbors to celebrate together.

“Rejoice with me, for I have found my lost sheep.”

Three actions—getting lost, finding, and celebrating—are the recurring themes in this story.

Getting lost. The good news is that the Lord goes out to find those who are lost. We often lose the way in the various situations we encounter or in which we live or even take refuge. These may include experiences of abandonment, marginalization, poverty, misunderstanding, or disunity. They are like the desert where the path ahead is unclear. The shepherd searches for us even in these places, and although we may lose sight of him, he will always find us.

Finding. Let us try to imagine the scene of the shepherd’s frantic search in the desert. It is an image that is striking in its expressive power. We can understand the joy felt by both the shepherd and the sheep when they find one another: this encounter restores that sense of security to the sheep because it has escaped danger. Thus, the “finding” is an act of divine mercy.

Celebration. The shepherd gathers his friends together to celebrate because he wants to share his joy, just as the main character does in the other two parables that follow this one: that of the lost coin and that of the merciful father. Jesus wants us to understand the importance of sharing joy with everyone and immunizes us against the temptation to judge each other. We have all been “found again.”

“Rejoice with me, for I have found my lost sheep.”

This Word of Life is an invitation to be grateful for the mercy God has for us all personally. Rejoicing and celebrating together present us with an image of unity, where there is no opposition between “righteous” and “sinners,” but we share in each other’s joy.

Chiara Lubich writes, “It is an invitation to understand the heart of God and to believe in his love. We are inclined to calculate and measure, and sometimes we believe that even God’s love may grow weary… but God’s logic is not like ours. God is always waiting for us; indeed, we bring him immense joy every time—even though it be an infinite number of times that we return to him.”

“Rejoice with me, for I have found my lost sheep.”

Sometimes we can be those shepherds, those caretakers, for one another and lovingly search for those who have drifted away from us, from our friendship, or from our community. We can look out for the marginalized, the lost, the people driven to the peripheries by the trials of life.

A teacher told us, “Some pupils didn’t come to classes regularly. When I was free, I used to go to the market near the school because I hoped to see them there because I knew some of them worked there to earn money. One day I finally found them. They were amazed that I had gone to look for them personally and were struck by the fact that they were really important to the whole school community. So they started to come to school regularly and it truly was a celebration for everyone.”

Prepared by Patrizia Mazzola & the Word of Life Team

𝚃𝚢𝚙𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝙾𝚞𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝙱𝚕𝚞𝚎 • 𝚍𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚖𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚎𝚛.𝚌𝚘𝚖